Vacationland: True Stories from Painful Beaches

4.5 | 1,961 ratings

Price: 13.78

Last update: 08-23-2024

About this item

John Hodgman - New York Times best-selling author, semifamous personality, deranged millionaire, increasingly elderly husband, father, and human of Earth - has written a memoir about his cursed travels through two wildernesses: from the woods of his home in Massachusetts, birthplace of rage, to his exile on the coast of Maine, so-called Vacationland, home to the most painful beaches on Earth.

Vacationland is also about Hodgman's wandering in the metaphoric wilderness of his 40s, those years when dudes especially must painfully stop pretending to be the children of bright potential they were and settle into the failing bodies of the wiser, weirder dads that they are.

Other subjects covered include the horror of freshwater clams, the evolutionary purpose of the mustache, which animals to keep as pets and which to kill with traps and poison, and advice on how to react when the people of coastal Maine try to sacrifice you to their strange god.

After three best-selling books of fake facts, Hodgman is finally ready to tell the truth - in the same outlandish, audacious, and inimitable style that has won him fans in every medium he has worked: books, stage, social media, television, and movies.

Suzy Buttress

Hodgman's wit, sensitivity and self-deprecating humour shines through

Reviewed in the United States on November 15, 2017

Summary: Funny, poignant, candid, and true tales from the life of bestselling author and humourist John Hodgman. I laughed, I wept, and I laughed again. A must-read!

I’ll admit upfront that I am biased: I admire John Hodgman enormously and enjoy his humour.

His previous immensely popular books of fake facts led the reader on wonderful journeys down rabbit holes of trivia. But times move on and fake facts are no longer the fun diversion they once were.

Vacationland is a stunning change of pace for Hodgman.

Entering his 40s he reached sudden clarity on his own mortality and potential lack of relevance in a youth-driven culture. He does not show any bitterness, however, but accepts that this is the natural order of things. We pave a way for those who come after. But - he is not obsolete yet!

In modest and self-deprecating terms he describes himself as a “strange, white, male monster with bad facial hair”. He shares key moments of his life, and sets them in the context of the locations where he has lived, from The Pioneer Valley in western Massachusetts to the “painful beaches” of Maine where he attests he will someday accept his death. He talks about his teenage years, fatherhood, and life as a ‘minor television celebrity’, and reflects on the events that have made him who he is.

Hodgman’s style is conversational, with beautiful descriptive passages that really evoke the visual scene or the emotional tone, and you can hear his distinctive voice as you read his words. The tales are funny, revealing, and downright heartbreaking at times. He shares himself with us as never before.

John Hodgman is a wonderful storyteller and Vacationland totally satisfies, yet leaves you hoping for sequels. Highly recommended!

J. D. Finch

He Got Here From There

Reviewed in the United States on April 20, 2020

The first part of Vacationland: True Stories from Painful Beaches is all that David Copperfield stuff that you might not want to hear about. But I did. After all, when you boil it down, we were all kids once, lacking agency in those early years, and floating like corks on an ocean. We all experience similar growing pains and I found it edifying to compare my cork days to Hodgman’s. While this part of his book didn’t exactly blast me into the stratosphere of literary ecstasy, it was entertaining and nostalgic; even if my own exposure to Western Massachusetts, including Boston and Brookline, didn’t happen until much later in life.

In Hodgman’s adulthood no matter how slightly off the rails things go for him (and it’s never really too far) the events and doings the author presents in Vacationland all seem a part of the Hodgman plan. Sort of like when Pesci says to De Niro in Raging Bull “Even when you lose, you win.” No longer a cork, he’s now a fairly big fish who through talent and luck gets to swim with the sharks.

I enjoyed seeing how much mileage John Hodgman gets out of being celebrity “John Hodgman,” a situation he assays further in the follow-up to this book, Medallion Status, which I have in line to enjoy (I am confident) after Vacationland.

Here he relates going about doing this and that in Maine, not naming certain things, people or locations. Kind of like how the Beats would name someone thus: “D--- sauntered down the alley like a twice-blessed hipster…”

Hodgman does the “shall remain nameless” thing, I imagine, primarily out of privacy concerns in these stalking, doxing, and “calling out” times. While the Beats -- just my theory -- did it out of fear they’d be roughed up or robbed by their subjects. (Hint: They were not nice people.)

Nobody in the world would ever want to rough up Hodgman. Because he’s our pal who would never betray our belief in him by playing the “Do you know who I am?!” card. Just listen -- if you have the audio book of this; if not I recommend it so you may experience Hodgman fully -- to his dulcet tones and on-the-money phrasings. I believe you might miss certain jokes and authorial ironies if only read on the page, where the expressiveness that comes through via audio presentation is lacking. You will also better appreciate the author’s equanimity, which seems almost divine: No Nonplussed Malcontents of Life Club member is he.

He can seem rather pleased with himself, though he gets credit for only mentioning his time at Yale five or six times, which I am told is quite conservative for the former attendees of that august institution. Related to that perhaps, a bit of “John Hodgman’s” smugness peeks through now and then. But that comes with the territory, like that stolen by the white man -- of which John Hodgman is one -- from the Indians. (Apologies for that hamfisted segue.) Truly, in this regard his personal manifest destiny is sensitively bemoaned by the author, who, within flashes of self-knowledge, admits to his white privilege while thankfully not going so far as to “put on the hair shirt” or engage in literal self-flagellation. Bracketing these sensitive moments is the Hodgman humor, and somehow he manages to walk this particular ethical tightrope with aplomb.

In summation, John Hodgman comes off as a good fellow. I’ve seen a number of authors who have “made it” become unattractively smug and “high hat”: which is a charming old term that means “condescending.” (You know the hats they were talking about.) But as for Hodgman, so charming is he that when I think I find this tendency (smugness) beginning to creep into his schtick I think, “Maybe it’s not him, but me.”

So then, I recommend Vacationland, especially for New England residents who are curious about how those who have a measure of fame (a group that includes New England second-home-havers Oprah, Whoopi, John Irving (actually first home, I believe), almost Nicole Kidman, Johnny Depp (rumored), etc.) conduct themselves when they get away from the hurly-burly of their world by escaping to their places in the land of syrup and pine trees to ostensibly become “just folks,” if only temporarily. For all his accomplishment and level of fame, John Hodgman -- if not “John Hodgman” -- seems to fit in there like a hand in a glove.

A.J.

John Hodgman's Vacationland! The description of Perry's Nut House is worth the price alone.

Reviewed in the United States on November 23, 2017

First, a confession. I listen to the Judge John Hodgman podcast weekly. I've read the trilogy of fake trivia books. I follow him on Twitter (but not in real life cause that's creepy and I live 3000 miles away, so very inconvenient). I attended his brilliant chat with Patt Morrison in LA (what? The one where Nick Offerman was also a guest?!) Okay so I'm a fan. Of all of it. This is by far my favorite work of his. It is, as he promised, the John Hodgman you know from JJHO. The sincere, thoughtful person we all listen to weekly (with Baliff Jesse Thorn) who by his careful, nuanced and kind reasoning reminds us that there are many good, sane people in the world. I'll stop fan girling. Please buy yourself this book and buy one for a friend. It's funny and thoughtful. He's brilliant but made some of the same youthful mistakes we all did! He's a guy who's grateful for his success, let's give him a little more.

Dirk T

Good book but maybe read his other books first?

Reviewed in the United States on March 25, 2021

This is the first book I have read by John Hodgman so it is not possible to compare to his other books, but I really enjoyed his stories and writing style. He is very relatable, funny and clever. Very enjoyable. The only negative thing I can say is that he refers a lot to his unexpected fame and previous books (really a lot). I wasn’t really aware of him before so found this took a lot from the flow but often was important to some of the stories. Maybe because I have lived overseas for a long time?

It might make more sense to read his other book(s) first but hard to comment since I didn’t read them yet.

ArtemisEnteri

Privilege Comedy

Reviewed in the United States on January 4, 2024

As a fan of the way he speaks on podcasts, it is amazing how well John Hodgman translates his speech patterns into written script. Hilarious, thoughtful, evocative.

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