You Are Your Best Thing: Vulnerability, Shame Resilience, and the Black Experience

4.8 4.8 out of 5 stars | 1,713 ratings

Price: 18

Last update: 02-04-2025


About this item

New York Times Best Seller Tarana Burke and Dr. Brené Brown bring together a dynamic group of Black writers, organizers, artists, academics, and cultural figures to discuss the topics the two have dedicated their lives to understanding and teaching: vulnerability and shame resilience.

Contributions by Kiese Laymon, Imani Perry, Laverne Cox, Jason Reynolds, Austin Channing Brown, and more.

Named One of the Best Books of the Year by Marie Claire and Bookriot

It started as a text between two friends.

Tarana Burke, founder of the ‘me too.’ Movement, texted researcher and writer Brené Brown to see if she was free to jump on a call. Brené assumed that Tarana wanted to talk about wallpaper. They had been trading home decorating inspiration boards in their last text conversation so Brené started scrolling to find her latest Pinterest pictures when the phone rang.

But it was immediately clear to Brené that the conversation wasn’t going to be about wallpaper. Tarana’s hello was serious, and she hesitated for a bit before saying, “Brené, you know your work affected me so deeply, but as a Black woman, I’ve sometimes had to feel like I have to contort myself to fit into some of your words. The core of it rings so true for me, but the application has been harder.”

Brené replied, “I’m so glad we’re talking about this. It makes sense to me. Especially in terms of vulnerability. How do you take the armor off in a country where you’re not physically or emotionally safe?”

Long pause.

“That’s why I’m calling,” said Tarana. “What do you think about working together on a book about the black experience with vulnerability and shame resilience?”

There was no hesitation.

Burke and Brown are the perfect pair to usher in this stark, potent collection of essays on black shame and healing. Along with the anthology contributors, they create a space to recognize and process the trauma of white supremacy, a space to be vulnerable and affirm the fullness of black love and black life.


Top reviews from the United States

  • Mystic Elf
    5.0 out of 5 stars Powerful summer reading
    Reviewed in the United States on May 22, 2021
    This book is written to give voice to the experiences of Black people. Too often, they may be only be seen at those who are impacted most directly by racism. That is a part of their identity, and they also live lives of blessing and strength and challenge.

    This book is a collection of essays from writers, artists, educators, activists and others. They speak in the first person, in Tarana Burke's words, to "give our humanity breathing room."

    You Are Your Best Thing: Vulnerability, Shame Resilience, and the Black Experience, edited by Tarana Burke and Brene Brown.

    From the introduction by the editors:

    Brene: I kept thinking about bell hook's concept of lovelessness and how she talks about lovelessness as the root of white supremacy and the patriarchy and all forms of oppression. And that the answer to lovelessness is love. I've read bell hooks for thirty years, but these essays and the process of co-creating with you taught me what love in the face of lovelessness really feels like. The marrow of it. When you say, "I don't trust any antiracism work that doesn't embrace and see our humanity," I can feel the call for love. I get it so fully right now. It's like you're telling us that if you don't see the heart and the love and the humanity and the joy of the Black experience -- of Black humanity -- then the anti-racism work is bankrupt.

    Tarana: Exactly. It's just like knowing something intellectually but not feeling it, and this is feeling work. It's heart work as much as it is head work. Those two things have to be in tandem. And I love that we have the ability to make this offering to Black folks who have felt stifled in this moment and overwhelmed and have not had space.

    This is not a book to be rushed through. It is a book to breathe into, to weep with, to celebrate. I invite you to savor it, even if, like me, a white woman, you feel a bit like a peeping tom.
  • Jackie NYC
    5.0 out of 5 stars A must read for any and everyone!
    Reviewed in the United States on November 12, 2023
    This book has lightened the load and fed my soul. It captures the Black experience so vividly and beautifully. I see myself in this book. As I read each page I was excited to see what was next! Such a great read! This book is a read that’s necessary and fulfilling. This book provokes thought, a sense of understanding and belonging, and healing. Get the book!!!! Gift the book!
  • za dood
    5.0 out of 5 stars Candid relatable narratives Includes strong frameworks/strategies for resilience and managing trauma
    Reviewed in the United States on June 6, 2022
    I was compelled to read “You Are The Best Thing: vulnerability, shame, resilience, and the Black experience”, because as a white person, and as a social justice and healthcare enthusiast I wanted to deepen my understanding of the Black experience in the United States, and also because I have a ton of respect for the work of both these editor/authors, Tarana Burke and Brene Brown, and I knew that this book had a lot of promise.

    I found that the most profound aspect of these amazing essays was how well the authors were able to communicate their experiences into such universal truths, in such a way that it would be really difficult not to relate to these intimate experiences and narratives - a powerful empathy generating body of work. Furthermore, the wisdom and strategies regarding how to manage being othered, exploited, targeted, on top of learning how to deal with the general stress of surviving in our current socio-economic culture was nothing more than paradigm-shifting. These are things I’m actively trying to cultivate in own my life too.

    We have so much to learn from each other - I believe that together we can get through these hard times, utilizing this type of learning and connection; we can be vulnerable, we can manage our shame, and we can support each other as we grow ourselves and evolve our society.

    So grateful for having had the opportunity to read this amazing anthology! Highly recommend!
  • Hudmn160
    5.0 out of 5 stars A Great Book!
    Reviewed in the United States on October 27, 2024
    Wonderful, and very well put together testimonies. Highly recommend it to your readers for educational value.
  • CR
    5.0 out of 5 stars Remarkable journies
    Reviewed in the United States on January 16, 2023
    This collection of essays on vulnerability of and for Black women is touching, insightful and wise. I studied it in a book club of men and women, Black and White. Each author bared some of her soul and hardest lessons learned about shame and resilience. I came away feeling it is part of life to be shamed and feel vulnerable, especially in ways inbred in society. I also feel I have new tools to live through those emotions and handle life well. I highly recommend this book for book clubs. Ours read 2-3 essays per meeting and it generated great discussions.
  • Kindle Customer
    4.0 out of 5 stars Black vulnerability matters
    Reviewed in the United States on May 11, 2021
    This book is an important compliment to Brene Browns work. Black vulnerability is different from white vulnerability and deserves to be a unique focus. The essays were good and it would be good to have a scholar!y discussion about the issue too.
  • Krysy
    5.0 out of 5 stars you will cry
    Reviewed in the United States on July 1, 2024
    such a great book of essays
  • Karie L. Alton
    5.0 out of 5 stars The Humanness of Life
    Reviewed in the United States on August 15, 2022
    Tarana and Brene offer up a cadre of black lives and who provide us an intimate peak at the horror and glory that make up this beautiful diaspora. As a white person I appreciate this glimpse into the powerful nuances of real people who have been damaged and strengthened; who have endured, overcome and excelled despite centuries of daily micro and macro oppression and abuse.

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