Stop People Pleasing: And Find Your Power

4.8 4.8 out of 5 stars | 21 ratings

Price: 17.71

Last update: 05-28-2024


About this item

A viral life coach offers a practical, empathetic, and inspiring guide to breaking people-pleasing patterns that can harm our careers, relationships, physical, and psychic health.

For most of Hailey Magee’s life, people-pleasing came so naturally to her that she didn’t even have a word for it. When somebody wanted something from her—even a stranger—she gave it, no matter how uncomfortable, exhausted, or resentful she felt inside. People-pleasing, she learned, was a coping mechanism that had kept her physically and emotionally safe in the past, but wreaked havoc on her life in the present—and she was committed to breaking the pattern once and for all.

The solution that social media and self-help shelves gave her was to “Advocate for yourself! Speak up! Set boundaries!” But after years of ignoring her feelings and needs, Magee needed more than boundaries; she needed to reconnect with the “self” who was supposed to be doing the advocating. You can’t express yourself if you’re cut off from your feelings. You can’t fight for your needs if you don’t know what they are. And you can’t set boundaries with others until you believe you’re worthy of more than the bare minimum. Radically reconnecting with herself gave Magee the confidence and self-respect she needed to stand up for herself in her relationships. As she experienced a freedom she never thought possible, she became a certified life coach with the mission of helping others do the same.

Stop People Pleasing explains how anyone can break the pattern by learning their own feelings, needs, values, and desires; ending cycles of enmeshment and codependency; overcoming guilt; developing physical and sexual agency; and more. It is a refreshingly nuanced guide, exploring fundamental questions like:

-How can I tell when my genuine kindness veers into people-pleasing?

-How can I set boundaries while maintaining my empathy and generosity?

-When is it appropriate to compromise on my needs, and when is it not?

Combining social science, psychology, and hands-on coaching exercises, Stop People Pleasing teaches you how to connect with your own feelings, needs, and dreams; courageously advocate for yourself in your relationships with friends, family, and colleagues; soothe yourself through the growing pains of healing; and dive headfirst into pleasure and play. With fresh insight, heartfelt empathy, and a keen personal understanding of the pitfalls of people-pleasing, Magee helps you say what you need and get what you deserve.

PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.


Top reviews from the United States

A. Bunnell
5.0 out of 5 stars This work is life changing.
Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2024
This book has added an important piece to the current popular conversation that is occurring around people pleasing and boundary setting. The language is well honed and the organization is broken down into four parts which follow in logical sequence. Finding yourself, standing up for yourself, taking care of yourself and finally enriching yourself. It goes us through the complicated life we live to discover our own needs and values, set boundaries with others, work through our own emotions regarding those boundaries and finally incorporate these into a richer life with new ways to play and relate to others.

I think one of the most important aspects of this book is that it brings a nuanced approach to the concepts. I find the current dialogue to be far too black and white and perhaps more damaging than good. This book brings complexity to the forefront and gives many practical exercises for how to work through it all.

I find the values exercise very clarifying. It has helped my understand what direction i want to take with a new business and my current job.

Kudos to Hailey Magee for bringing this gift to us all. I highly recommend reading it either here or on audible. It will have a significant and positive impact on the way you live.
Customer image
A. Bunnell
5.0 out of 5 stars This work is life changing.
Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2024
This book has added an important piece to the current popular conversation that is occurring around people pleasing and boundary setting. The language is well honed and the organization is broken down into four parts which follow in logical sequence. Finding yourself, standing up for yourself, taking care of yourself and finally enriching yourself. It goes us through the complicated life we live to discover our own needs and values, set boundaries with others, work through our own emotions regarding those boundaries and finally incorporate these into a richer life with new ways to play and relate to others.

I think one of the most important aspects of this book is that it brings a nuanced approach to the concepts. I find the current dialogue to be far too black and white and perhaps more damaging than good. This book brings complexity to the forefront and gives many practical exercises for how to work through it all.

I find the values exercise very clarifying. It has helped my understand what direction i want to take with a new business and my current job.

Kudos to Hailey Magee for bringing this gift to us all. I highly recommend reading it either here or on audible. It will have a significant and positive impact on the way you live.
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Customer image
RxReads
4.0 out of 5 stars Highly Recommended!
Reviewed in the United States on May 14, 2024
This book was a game-changer for me. It felt like Hailey Magee was speaking right to my soul, addressing the people-pleasing tendencies that have been holding me back for so long. Her journey adds a relatable touch, making the advice feel genuine and actionable. What I loved most is how she doesn't just tell you to set boundaries and speak up; she guides you through reconnecting with yourself first, which is where real change starts. The mix of practical exercises and insightful questions helped me uncover layers I didn't even know were there. If you're tired of saying yes when you really want to say no, this book is a must-read.

I have to admit, at first, I was skeptical. Another self-help book claiming to have all the answers? But Stop People Pleasing surprised me. It's not just about saying no or setting boundaries; it's about understanding why we feel the need to please others in the first place. Magee dives deep into the psychology behind it all, offering empathy and understanding every step of the way. Her approach is refreshingly nuanced, acknowledging that it's not always easy to break free from these patterns. By the end, I felt empowered and ready to start advocating for myself in a way I never thought possible. Highly recommend it to anyone ready to reclaim their power and live life on their own terms.
Eleanor Richards
5.0 out of 5 stars Now I have a roadmap forward...
Reviewed in the United States on May 15, 2024
This book is life-changing. I am a hopeless people-pleaser, and I find myself constantly depleted and resentful. I love how the author really helps you navigate out of this state with grace and empathy. I find some of the boundary books on the market to be too harsh. This book is the kind, nuanced take a people-pleaser like me needs. Highly, highly recommend!
Abby Magee
5.0 out of 5 stars Changing a lifelong pattern can be done!
Reviewed in the United States on May 14, 2024
I’ve been a people pleaser all my life. Have desperately tried in the past to break the cycle but failed.
Hailey’s book has enabled me to change how I look at things and be more forthright about my boundaries. She gave examples of real situations and gave me the tools to turn things around.
Anne W.
4.0 out of 5 stars Informative, Self-Help
Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2024
Haley Magee had been a people pleaser for most of her life - that type of behavior was natural for her, whether she was going out of her way to help friends and family or even strangers. She was often exhausted, and it created problems in her own life. Finally, she made the decision to break the unhealthy pattern of living she found herself in.
After much research, the conclusion that much of this behavior develops in childhood as self-preservation. Often just ordinary kindness can be also can be confused with people pleasing. Helpful advice is provided how to break unhealthy patterns and ending the cycle of constantly feeling the need to take care of the needs of others. This book will guide you to better relationships with family and friends and help determine the difference in offering kindness or continuing being a people pleaser.
I received a complimentary copy of this book. All comments and opinions are my own.
Kelsey
5.0 out of 5 stars I can’t read this fast enough!
Reviewed in the United States on May 16, 2024
I’ve followed Hailey’s content on Instagram, which has helped me a ton. But to see it all organized in this book, plus personal anecdotal stories, plus the insights from scientific research… so helpful as I figure out how to overcome my people-pleasing habits. Very thorough and thoughtfully written.
R.C.
5.0 out of 5 stars Game-Changer! Top 5 for Relational Healing
Reviewed in the United States on May 14, 2024
I was fortunate enough to receive an advanced copy of this book which is fitting because I needed to read it about 10 years ago! I’ve been writing and speaking in the relationship space on Instagram for years and no other voice has so perfectly described the people-pleasers struggle or so eloquently and kindly laid out instructions on how to overcome it. Hailey is an inspiration and her message is a breath of fresh air amongst a world full of influencers who try to blame and shame folks into changing. In “Stop People Pleasing” Hailey leads readers with her kind tone and a firm but loving authority. The concrete examples throughout the book of how to apply these concepts are also so, SO welcome to those of us who didn’t grow up speaking this way. A revelation, truly. This book will change lives for the better. :*)
Customer image
R.C.
5.0 out of 5 stars Game-Changer! Top 5 for Relational Healing
Reviewed in the United States on May 14, 2024
I was fortunate enough to receive an advanced copy of this book which is fitting because I needed to read it about 10 years ago! I’ve been writing and speaking in the relationship space on Instagram for years and no other voice has so perfectly described the people-pleasers struggle or so eloquently and kindly laid out instructions on how to overcome it. Hailey is an inspiration and her message is a breath of fresh air amongst a world full of influencers who try to blame and shame folks into changing. In “Stop People Pleasing” Hailey leads readers with her kind tone and a firm but loving authority. The concrete examples throughout the book of how to apply these concepts are also so, SO welcome to those of us who didn’t grow up speaking this way. A revelation, truly. This book will change lives for the better. :*)
Images in this review
Customer image

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